A Road Worth Traveling
In our first blog post ‘A New Birth’ I mention being in the process of writing a book on my husband, Jim’s story. As these posts have unfolded, we believe it is time to launch into telling his story on our blog, coming in the form of chapters and characters. We are hoping you will be able to follow along as we share the intimacy of a God who really does care about His children and joins us on a road worth traveling.
Prologue to the Journey
He leans against my leg, whimpering, wanting to be held. As I reach down to draw the young dog up to a place of warmth, I realize how far he's come. There was a time when he would pull back, sit on his haunches, and look at you with such fear. Yet the longing in those hungry brown eyes made you want to cry for his pain. Before coming to this family, there were years of abuse, kicking, yelling, hunger pangs — a constant feeling of fear deep within his gut—desperately wanting to trust but expecting more disappointment and pain. So out would come the fangs, the growl — a defense against anyone who would reach out to him. He knew no other way. He was a small wounded puppy living in a grown dog’s body. He was a rescue dog.
Patience and repetitive gentleness ultimately tore down his defenses. He came into a family who wanted him— one who showered him with food, warmth, and love. Gradually, the growling ceased and gave way to a wagging tail and receptiveness to a warm cuddle. A slobbery dog smile replaced the teeth-baring grimace. As I held him close to where he can hear the soothing beating of my heart, I realize this is how it often is with us humans. We are wounded so profoundly that anger, bitterness, and withdrawal are the fangs we show the world.
Have you ever met a grown adult who has the emotional maturity of a five-year-old? Perhaps a man or woman who has experienced abandonment or abuse, whether emotional or physical and is trying to live in an adult world. Somewhere along the line, he or she has shut down emotionally. He might seemingly function well in other areas of his life. Still, certain aspects of his emotions have shut down, keeping him from genuinely healthy relationships. Why does he do that? It's similar to the abused puppy. Deep wounds cause him to withdraw as a means of self-preservation. He begins to isolate himself and get lost in his work. He takes on false comforts, whether it be unhealthy relationships, sex, alcohol, drugs, or a myriad of other distractions and dependencies which attempt to feed the hunger deep within his soul.
“Time heals nothing. It only builds hurt upon hurt, as we bury the wounds and find all manner of means to escape our pain, wounding, and unforgiveness.”
Our parents are the first ones we meet in our lives. From that initial breath of life, our mother and father are meant to give us the sustenance which feeds us. Mother provides us with the milk of life. In a perfect world, she nurtures and provides the warmth by which we survive. At the same time, it's the father who is designed to create a sense of value and importance in our early lives. He builds self-worth, a sense of value in our hearts—a foundation that carries us into the years ahead when life hits us head-on. Our entire worldview can be affected by how our father has, or hasn't, impacted our early years. Was he there, or was he absent? If we haven't felt a sense of belonging in those first years, we deal with life through the lens of our insecurities and poor self-esteem. How do we live? Do we try to forget—pushing it back deep into our memory banks? Do we face it head-on and forgive? Is there a God in heaven who even cares?
What we share in the posts to come are meant to bring hope. There is an answer. Not necessarily an easy or comfortable one, but one which if any of us choose to go down that road, can open a door for freedom and healing. We are about to embark upon the story of a young man who experienced abandonment but also discovered the love of a Heavenly Father who went to great lengths to show him how deeply loved he was and how intimate that Father would become in his life.
“My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. John 10:29”
