The Forgiveness Challenge
Welcome to 2021 - We are nearly two weeks into the new year, and I am just now catching up. The Christmas decorations and tree are all stored, the house cleaning underway, and files pulled out to organize for tax season! Out with the old and in with the new. Our hope and prayer for you in this coming year is you will experience more of the presence of God and His continual faithfulness in each moment of your lives….whatever this year may hold.
The ending of a passing year and the beginning of a new one always causes one to reflect. I would hear over and over again from people – "We are so glad to say good-bye to 2020." As if January 1, 2021, would overnight change everything. In the last days of 2020, I felt the need to go back over the past 12 months—all of its disappointments, shocks, and unexpected, unprecedented events. Something stirred within me, and I began to write down all the blessings from the year in my journal. I knew there were some. As I wrote and wrote, pages began to fill.
I was nearing the end of page four when I looked at the time and had to stop for some things needing to be done. I was amazed and EXCEEDINGLY BLESSED to see the faithfulness of God written before me. I left space to write more as time allowed. Amid the chaos and, for many, the pain and losses of 2020, there are blessings—possibly hidden and waiting to be noticed. If we take the time to stop and look, we will be amazed at how God was with us each moment. Our Father never left us. Yes, it was a challenging year, and I didn't even come close to the pain I know some experienced, but if we look, really look, we will see our Father loved us and provided everything we needed. There are stories to be told. Our world is changing rapidly, but God remains steadfast. Yesterday, today, and FOREVER. (Hebrews 13:8)
As I mentioned back at the end of May, when this blog birthed, I usually ask God for a 'word' for my upcoming year. I have done this now for 5+plus years, and it has proven to be a valuable growth tool in my life. A book I came across a few years ago helped with this journey, My One Word by Mike Ashcroft.
As I waited and prayed for 'my one word' for 2021, only one word kept coming to mind. And I, honestly, kept pushing it away. I wanted something more uplifting. Joy….laughter…..love….etc. I felt my heart needed a cheerful and inspiring word. But as is often the case when God wants our attention, the word would not go away. It refused to stay on the shelf I kept placing it. And so one morning, I took the word off the shelf and gave in to God. Like you, I expect, I want to go deeper with God each year. This word is bound to take me there. I confess this word brings a bit of apprehension as my mind goes crazy, wondering what circumstances could emerge in my life where I have to 'walk this word out.' It seems scary and wonderful, all at once. Actually, scarier, if I'm sincere. This word requires offense, hurt, and possibly more pain than I want or am ready for. But, if I am continually honest, Jim and I base our whole lives and ministry on this principle. It is the foundation and life of our stories. And it is deeply embedded in the heart of our Father God.
“But with you there is forgiveness,
so that we can, with reverence, serve you.”
“ In him, we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us.”
And so, with my heart (and the stories of this blog) laid out before God, I embrace my word for 2021.
As we continue to share stories of freedom and forgiveness here on this blog, I feel led to lay out a personal challenge. Forgiveness is a principle about which Jesus continually speaks. A command. One given firmly but with love because He knows it will set us free. It is a word with which He literally ended his life (Luke 23:34).
We'll call it THE FORGIVENESS CHALLENGE. Peter asked Jesus how many times should he forgive his brother or sister when they hurt him (Matt. 18:21). Jesus' answer— continually. What if there are people in our lives who frequently hurt us. Whether intentionally or unintentionally. Marriages end because of disappointment upon disappointment building up over the years. What if a spouse, instead of letting those hurts build-up, daily forgave? Let me say, and I don't disregard the hurt, or the continual need for communication and honesty to clear up those disagreements or hurts, but what if….when they happen, a conscious choice to forgive. To pray, work through it and forgive.
The friend, the child, the co-worker (the Facebook/Instagram post), who again, intentionally or unintentionally, says something which offends or hurts you. That person whom you don't know cuts you off in traffic. That news broadcaster or politician who offends you. Every time you walk out the front door (or don't), and you risk hurt and offense.
WHAT IF…. We are thoughtful and intentional to take that moment, and a big deep breath, and forgive? It is a choice. Depending on who it is who hurts us, emotions play a part. Ask God, who cares, to help you lay aside the feeling. Say the words, "I forgive _____." WHAT IF….we don't allow unforgiveness to control us or offenses to build up. WHAT IF developing a HABIT of forgiveness will actually set us free to live a more peaceful existence. There's so much more to we can say on this, but I will leave it there.
THE FORGIVENESS CHALLENGE – this year 2021, two thoughts…
1) Every night before you lay your head down, ask God, “Is there someone I need to forgive today?”
2) Perhaps that is just one more thing to remember in our list of ‘resolutions’. So, what if every week, pick a day, and ask God if there is someone you need to forgive that week?
It might not be a BIG THING – like the supermarket checker overcharging you, and you didn't notice it until you got all the way home; the person who rudely moved ahead of you and took your parking spot, etc. Rather than ramming that car because you have more insurance—like Wanda in the movie Fried Green Tomatoes. Just imagine the peace you could discover by taking a big deep breath, focusing and forgiving, and giving it over to God. Not letting offenses build up and destroy your day.
OR it could be BIG—a comment your spouse said, a text, someone dear to you being in a hurry and inadvertently saying something that touched a nerve. Your life could experience more peace and freedom by the simple (and perhaps not easy) act of forgiving. There's the big stuff and the little stuff – it all requires the same action.
And in the forgiving, let go. This is another difficult part. Sometimes, we can say the words, but to let it go is another thing. Not easy at times. Much of the time, we cannot do this in our own strength. Ask God to help you let go. To give you the grace. Even if it requires going back several times a day….let it go. Often, I will do a symbolic gesture, like holding out my hands to God, and ask Him to help me let go. He knows my heart.
On a personal note, no sooner had I began this challenge in my own life did I face continuous times during the day of needing to forgive. I'm either a person who is easily offended (I hope not!) or there are many opportunities to forgive I didn't see before! God has my attention to be sure, and my prayer is I will go more in-depth with Him— one level deeper, practicing a very loving commandment. I'm keeping space in my daily journal to record daily/weekly acts of forgiveness to keep me accountable, especially on the big stuff.
Will you join me? Share stories of how God is bringing more peace and freedom into your life through forgiveness. In the big and small stuff. Your understanding of the Fatherheart of God will grow profoundly. God promises grace to you and me as we forge into 2021.
